Mr Thirsty.

Yesterday was Emma's first dental appointment.  Oh settle down.  Yes she's four and she has the worst diet on the planet and I wrenched the pacifier out of her trembling fingers just this past April (I kept it in a drawer in case I needed to negotiate for something BIG).   But I didn't really HAVE a dentist.   I am an Anti-Dentite (reference: Seinfeld) so I try to avoid the dentist...read as...I don't go unless the pain is severe or I can't chew chocolate or God forbid the cold Diet Pepsi is making me pass out because it hurts my teeth.

Anyway. Found a dentist that was supposed to be good with kids and made the Rat Toothed child an appointment.  She recently lost both bottom front teeth which freaked me out a little.  I thought that maybe I'd harmed her mouth for life with the orthodontically correct pacifier and it was causing all her teeth to fall out.  She had learned all about the dentist at school and she thought it sounded "fun!".....so I just let her think that.

Last night, right before we went to the appointment, I sprung it on her that she was going to the dentist.  "YAY!!!  The DENTIST!!!"  She skipped all the way to the waiting room.  I filled out all the ridiculously repetitive  paper work while she hummed happily on the floor playing with some office toy.  They called her back to the room and she hopped happily up in the chair.  They played her a couple of cute videos about two dogs who go to the dentist and Emma sat in the chair totally nonplussed like this was the best thing she'd done all summer.  The hygienist took her to another room to get her x-rays and I expected some hesitation, but nope...again with the skipping.  Back in the chair, they cleaned her teeth and she giggled the whole time and used the suction herself (aka Mr Thirsty) to suck out the saliva and tooth paste.  At one point she was laughing so hard that the hygienist stopped to ask if she was choking and Emma helplessly shook her head no and went back to giggling hysterically. It all ended with a dentist autographed picture of her x-rays to take to school, a new princess toothbrush and some dinosaur flossers.  She skipped happily back out to the waiting area and called out "I can't WAIT to come back!!"

Let's talk about MY dental experience.  The place LOOKED like we were in the Soviet Union and smelled strongly of fluoride or alcohol or some vile dental product.  My dentist was short, Greek and CRABBY.  There was no cherry toothpaste to clean teeth or smiley blond hygienist, it was funky tasting SPACKLE with extra GRIT and it was applied by said CRABBY GREEK DENTIST.  And AND.... there was NO Mr Thirsty.... it was the dreaded SPIT SINK. EWWWWW.... Okay okay... I have to stop, I'm getting all sweaty and shaky. 

Emma got into the car last night and sighed happily holding her dentist treasures.  I remember stomping to the car, slamming the door and giving my mother the evil hairy eyeball.  Emma may have a permanently damaged mouth, but at least will be well adjusted and won't hate me while she takes care of it.  I'm a good mom after all.