Don't Know Much bout Geography

Joe: Can you get to the ocean from Chicago?
Chris: Ummmm...
Joe: You know...by water
Chris: Well there's the St Lawrence Seaway and the Mississippi River
Joe: Which oceans do those go to?
Chris: The Atlantic and the Gulf of Me-hi-co
Joe: What about the Pacific?
Chris: Gotta carry your canoe on your head a really long ways.