Business must be good

It's ridiculously cold here. It's outer space cold. The kind of cold that doesn't seem to care if you have a coat on or not. You can wear wool, you can wear Therma-something-or-other. You can wear heated socks and you're STILL going to be cold as soon as you step out side the door. Temp last night. ZERO. That guy in the picture is the grapevine snowman who lives on our patio during the holidays who we haven't dragged into the garage yet along with all the summer planters that are still back there containing their crispy-frozen plants. I keep looking at the empty bird feeder and thinking..."I should go feed those poor birds". But what self respecting bird is going to leave the edge of a chimney long enough to come and wrap his little scaly birdy toes around my bird feeder for food I got at Lowe's? How do birds' feet not just SNAP OFF in this kind of weather now that I think about it? There can't be that much blood flowing their feet. (Now I'm obsessing...). No really, think about it...all kinds of things just crack right off when it's this cold, water pipes freeze, cars won't start, people get freaking FROST BITTEN. Birds? Nope, out there dancing around on their twiggy little feet. Has anybody studied this??? Basically there is nothing to a damn bird. If I wrap myself in a feather boa and stand outside in my bare feet today...I'm going to freeze my ass off! And end up on the news. I think I'll go make their birds some sort of treat...or knit them some socks...what is it three toes? Four toes? (Trying to remember Big Bird...was he even accurate?). Oh screw it...I'll just go fill the feeder after I put on my space suit.