700 STICKERS!!!!

I was in Target on Saturday. I was there to buy a few supplies for my 15 year old's birthday party that night...but I get so distracted in Target...they play no music in that store..have you ever noticed that? No music in The Target...I think it's so it doesn't drown out the subliminal, low tone messages they play "buy shit you don't need..buy shit you don't need...buy your dog a Halloween costume...buy shit you don't need". I'm tellin ya, I walk around that store in the daze. "Look at all the cool stuff in the dollar bins" I cooed to my 15 year old who came along for the torture..I mean, trip. His reply was "KEEP A STEPPIN". I managed to get a pair of Halloween socks for Emma and a bag of assorted plastic jungle animals into the cart anyway. And I caught him eyeing the candy corn shaped playing cards...who WOULDN'T love those!

So the mission was to get Emma new shoes, a few fall clothes and some snacks for the party...oh and a birthday card. We did pretty good in the shoes...I made him pick...between Dora shoes and athletic shoes...because I would have bought BOTH....come on..it's TARGET!!! So...shoes...check...I was pretty good through toys...OKAY I lied...that's where the 700 stickers come in. Emma loves little Einsteins. I think they are evil demon children trying to fill the world with their ear-worm music, but that's another story. ANYWAY...keep in mind I've been lulled into the Target-trance...on an endcap was a sticker book of all Little Einstein...and there were 700 stickers in the book. Greg (15 year old) says...NO...there will be little Einstein's EVERYWHERE, on EVERY surface, ON THE DOG, Mom!!" I just flipped dreamily through the pages and said "don't you think she'll love it??" The Target subliminal messages sang "YES YES YES" in my ear. So in went the book. THEN THEN....the Halloween stuff! You know how I am about Halloween!! Greg would have to admit that the Pomeranian sized mermaid Halloween costume almost had him...but I balked at spending 10 bucks on the dog. Then....I found this GREAT spider shaped candle holder! It has these really long legs and holds a tea light and it was only 3.50! or something...so I got that too...and then everything gets blurry and all I can remember is bags and bags of Halloween candy. And the drums...the loud drums beating out "buy more shit! buy more shit!" I couldn't even tell you what I all bought...I remember getting to the check out and saying "how'd that get in there" and looking at Greg through narrowed eyes...like HE'D done it. The only thing I can actually pin on him is the kazillion pack of gum I found in the bottom of the cart. Everything he put on the belt, I'd look at like I'd not seen it before and then give him a one-eyebrow-up look like "I don't know how it got in there".

By the way...I had 200 bucks in my purse...spent 199.75. And....the 700 Little Einstein stickers were a big hit. Not ONE on the dog (although she deserves it). AND I'm tellin you what...you gotta get one of those spiders....