First...let me point out that I'll bet MONEY that I'm the only person on the planet that has said the sentence "Sauce guy is clueless". I always enjoy those small moments of thinking that I'm totally unique...
ANYWAY...I've mentioned before...somewhere in this blog...I think...that I work for a doctors office. We have a variety of sales people who come to our office to peddle thier "stuff". They're all really nice and usually all ridiculously good looking and young. And they all bring us LUNCH. Really good lunches with really big cookies...I digress. After awhile, they all sort of run together with their company shirts and free pens and sticky note pads. Once in a while, one of them will do something to distinguish himself. One of those guys is Sauce Guy.
Sauce Guy sells some sort of surgical instrument. Couldn't tell you what he sells, but frighteningly enough, I know that he collects mustards. Yes. Mustard. He loves mustard and collects jars of interesting mustards (not interesting JARS, interesting MUSTARDS) and has a whole mustard collection at home (cough geek cough). One day, he brought one of our surgeons a jar of hot giardinara sauce. The surgeon LOVED it and put on everything from pizza to donuts. Okay, I'm lying about the donuts, but the guy put it in SOUP one day and that's where I draw the line. That's just weird! But hey...he's a surgeon...so whatever. Anyway, from that point onward we called this sales man SAUCE GUY! Hey Sauce Guy is coming for lunch. Hey Sauce Guy brought us a ten pound tub of grapes! Hey, we love Sauce Guy!
Sauce Guy (real name is Rob) came for lunch today and brought the required really big cookies. His wife is expecting a baby in November. We quickly got off the subject of surgical equipment and honed in the whole baby thing. He says "so I'm pretty new to this father thing...can I try to make her laugh during labor?" The new nurse in our office is a former OB Labor and Delivery nurse and without missing a beat she replied "not if you don't want your penis ripped off with her bare hands".
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