Not the sharpest crayon in the box

At our house, one of our hobbies is messing with the dog's head. It's fairly easy to do because Peaches is not one of those dogs that you're going to see in the newspaper anytime soon. You know the dogs I'm talking about. The Lassie kind...warning their owners that Timmy is in the well, or the house is burning down...that's not Peaches.

Just an example, Peach is the kind of dog that barks when the automatic icemaker drops ice in the bin in the freezer. This causes her to launch into a frenzy of wild barking that makes you think that Satan his very horned self is outside the back door. I was eating chicken noodle soup from a mug with a spoon recently and every time the spoon hit the side of the mug there was crazed, frantic barking. Hypersensitive you say? I don't think so...because this VERY DOG just ignored the newspaper hitting the front door with a CRASH when the news-kid delivered it. See what I'm saying here? Newspaper -> NOTHING. Icecubes -> FRANTIC BARKING.

So because she's so stupid...ahem..mentally deficient...no, no I was right the first time...stupid, we take the opportunity to mess with her. Our favorite game is "hey...let's go get donuts". All we have to say is "Peach...want to get the donuts?" and for some reason she does that funny thing that dogs do when they cock their head to the side and look all cute...know what I mean? (see picture above). So we say it about 130 times just to get the really cute reaction and she is so dumb, she does it every single time! Let me point out that Peaches has never gone to get donuts...either with or without us. She's never even eaten a donut. We don't even BUY donuts. Why she gets all intrigued and inquisitive when we ask her if she wants to go is just beyond us..but it's fun, and we're bored, so we keep doing it. Eventually, she makes a flying leap off the back of her security post (the sofa...gotta be on the look out up there for ice cubes) and whirls madly around while we interrogate her about getting the donuts. It ends the same way every time too...she keeps whirling madly and we always remark on how incredibly stupid she is and go back to reading the newspaper.

Now that I think about it, she's probably not the dumb one....she probably figures..."you freaks mess with me and I'm going bark EVERY DAMN TIME those ice cubes fall...we'll see who messes with WHO!"